What is more sacred: free speech or religious sanctity? If you are the “typical” person out there, and by typical I mean a citizen of the Western, modern, industrialized nations, why, of course, the right to express your own personal desires is the most sacred of the sacred. If you are religious in the “modern” sense, then you probably like religion somewhat, but believe it should, like a woman, stay in its rightful place: the home. If you are one of those odd, barbaric, backward peoples who believes religion is actually a sacred thing, then you know that you would rather die than see the things you hold dearer than your own life, desecrated.

I personally am not participating in marches or protests admittedly due to my own pessimism and pragmatism that there are things that are more worth my time and energy. However, I am very proud to be part of a people who are “backwards” in a world where “forward” means putting desire and materialism over all that is intangible. If my brothers and sisters get the UN to uphold some type of respect for the sacred beliefs of millions, then by God, more power to them. If that band of third-world, dark-skinned people manage to push this slick, modern world around a little, halleluja. But it does astound me how this world works. The sacred and the defiled are never removed from human society, merely assigned to different things.

To those who hate Islam and rejoice in its desecration, there is nothing to say to you. You are free to hate it as you wish.

To those of you who are merely trying to uphold “free speech” and are not particularly bent on destroying any world religion, culture, people, etc. then I say to you that you should be practical enough to see that what you hold sacred, ie freedom to draw a denigratory picture of a prophet, etc. is not sacred to others, and vice versa. How do you expect to moralize to others what they ought or ought not do when you clearly do not agree? Understand then that this world is full of challenges and we as human beings are destined to disagree, sometimes by words, sometimes by violence. That is human nature.

At least be honest about what you are doing. I remember a Danish fellow came on our message board, upset that Muslims would burn the Danish flag. So you feel you can draw as you wish, yet everyone will respect your beliefs and traditions? That the world will applaud you and roll out a red carpet in your honor? You are no more “righteous” than the person you believe has no righteousness, but is merely following tradition or is “brainwashed”, while you of course, are immune from such influences of time and place. You should have the balls to sacrifice yourself for what you believe. If you indeed believe in the freedom to speak, give your life for it, just as one who believes it is his sacred duty to maintain the holiness of God’s Name, would. If you insult some guy’s wife in a bar, you might get the crap kicked out of you unless after instigating him, you run to the police for protection and demand the law be upheld. :)

“And when it is said to them: ‘Make not mischief on the earth,’ they say, ‘We are only peacemakers!’ Indeed, they are the ones who are the ones who cause mischief, but they perceive it not.” (2:11 - 12)

But that is life - actions bring consequences, and we cannot blind ourselves, demanding our particular beliefs be maintained by the whole world, while we sit back in comfort. For if that were the case, you are no different than the “barbaric”, the “fascists”, the “backwards”, who have no understanding. Rather, this is jihaad, this is the struggle, for which we give our money, our speech, and our lives, to uphold what we think sacred, whether freedom of personal expression, or the sanctity of that what is holy (by the way, although Muslims are the most conspicuous in this incident, many “odd”, religious people of Christianity, Judaism, and others, even some of the atheistic “humanists” out there do have some respect for what others revere, even if they do not).

To those with some intelligence, I say to you that the ability to respect other beliefs is a trademark of virtue and character, and yes, that goes for Muslims as well. As Allah says in the Quran, “And insult not those whom they worship besides Allah, lest they insult Allah wrongfully without knowledge. Thus We have made fair-­seeming to each people its own doings; then to their Lord is their return and He shall then inform them of all that they used to do.” (6:108)

No one can deny that drawing pictures making fun of what people consider sacred, whether for one’s own entertainment or to force them to surrender to the temporal “humiliation” of having their sacred symbols defiled when they insist on having them upheld, is a sign of a barbaric people, which is why it is so ironic these acts are committed with the arrogant belief that the practitioner is somehow better than the “barbarians” they are protesting against. I do not agree with most of the religions and philosophies out there, but yes, I do have some respect.

Our neighbor asked me to assist him in summarizing a scientific paper from a journal of psychology relating to “Body Objectification”. You might be interested in skimming the summary of the study (lol what a screwed up society we live in, and how much “science” it takes to figure that out!).

Summary

Article: “The Role of Body Objectification in Disordered Eating and Depressed Mood”
Authors: Marika Tiggemann and Julia K. Kuring (School of Psychology, Flinders University of South Australia)
Journal: British Journal of Clinical Psychology, 2004, No. 43, pg.s 299 – 311

Study Summary

- Objectives: To test “Objectification Theory” related to psychological depression as well as to study any applications of it to men.
- Design: Cross-sectional study of general population.
- Method: 115 men and 171 women completed questionnaires measuring “self-objectification”, depressed moods, eating disorders, “body shame”, “appearance anxiety”, “flow”, and “awareness of internal states”.
- Results: For women depressed mood and eating disorders could be predicted by “self-objectification” and “self-surveillance”. Men showed
similar relationship patterns to women but did not generally exhibit “self-objectification”.
- Conclusion: “Objectification Theory” is useful in providing tools to predict mood depression and eating disorders.

Purpose of Study

Feminist theory has often claimed that societies which primarily view women as sexual objects result in many psychological and social problems for women in particular and society in general. However, through scientific research we can empirically confirm or disprove these claims. Indeed there is mounting scientific data to confirm that in a society in which women are “objectified”, women tend to become overly critical of their physical appearances, trying to achieve ideals which may not be possible for them to achieve. This leads to constant self-analysis, depression, passivity and/or victimization in relationships, and sexual dysfunction.
This study intends to cover a few specific areas in the study of “Body Objectification” which have not been addressed before, namely its relation to depression, eating disorders, and gender differences.

Study Components

Self-Objectification

Based on the Self-Objectification Questionnaire developed by Noll and Frederickson, the participants were asked to rate which physical qualities were most important to them in terms of their self-image. Five qualities encompassed health (strength, energy, etc.) while five addressed superficial appearance (weight, sex appeal, etc.). The higher a person scored (up to +25) the more emphasis they placed upon physical appearances and this indicated a higher level of “self objectification”.

Self-Surveillance

This portion of the study was assessed through the body surveillance subscale of McKinley and Hyde’s Objectified Body Consciousness Scale. Self surveillance refers to the amount of emphasis a person places upon thinking about their appearance in trying to conform to social standards of beauty or perfection. The higher the score, the higher the indication of self-surveillance.

Body Shame

This portion was also taken from McKinley and Hyde, utilizing the subscale of body shame. Body shame refers to how much impact negative social norms have on a person’s likelihood of feeling ashamed of their own body. Again, the higher the score, the more likely the participant felt ashamed of their physical appearance.

Appearance Anxiety

“Appearance Anxiety” refers to the fact that people feel nervous or pressured about the way they look. It was measured using the short form of Dion, Dion, and Keelan’s Appearance Anxiety Scale.

Flow

Flow was measured by the Flow State Scale developed by Jackson and Marsh. It gauges how a person tends to operate. People with higher flow states focus more on their tasks at hand and tend not to be self-conscious, inhibited, or distracted by external factors (most notably being conscious of oneself in relation to others and one’s physical appearance). People with lower flow states are constantly measuring themselves and therefore more involved in the social situation than in the mental tasks before them.

Awareness of Internal Bodily States

This was measured by the “private body consciousness” subscale of the Body Consciousness Scale developed by Miller, Murphy, and Buss. Awareness of internal bodily states indicates how aware a person is of their own body, not on a superficial level, but at the levels of sensation and function.

Disordered Eating

3 behavioral subscales: drive for thinness, bulimia, and body dissatisfaction, were used to measure propensity for eating disorders. This scale was taken from Garner, Olmsted, and Polivy’s EDI (Eating Disorder Inventory). The higher the score, the higher the participant’s susceptibility for eating disorders.

Depressed Mood

Using the BDI (Beck Depression Inventory), the study measured loss of pleasure in activities, psychosomatic disorders, and somatic complaints. The scores represented how the participants felt at the time of the study, higher scores indicating depressed moods.

Table of Findings (optional)

(attach tables here)

Conclusions

In general, women tend to score higher in self-objectification and self-surveillance, as well as the mediators of body shame and appearance anxiety, thus fulfilling the expected outcome of these traits correlating with disordered eating. Flow and depressed mood seemed independent of gender. However, women tended to be better at gauging internal states than men, most likely due to the propensity of women towards general sensitivity.
In studying the correlations between individual traits and resultant pathways of behavior, while women tended to score high on all these traits correlating to depression and disordered eating, men only scored significantly high on body shame and appearance anxiety in relation to the 2 correlated states. One should also note only self-surveillance correlated to disordered eating while self-objectification and self-surveillance did not correlate to depression. Disordered eating and depressed mood were intercorrelated for both men and women, but when partial correlations were tested, it was shown that self-objectification accounted for the variance between disordered eating and depressed mood.
Finally, the data was tested for causality and prediction. It was shown some of the pathways were insignificant and thus could be eliminated as indicating causality or being useful indicators. It was shown that for women, self-objectification leads to self-surveillance, which leads to body shame, appearance anxiety, and decreased flow. Body shame and appearance anxiety could both predict disordered eating and depressed mood. For men, flow tends to predict depressed mood. There is also a significant negative direct pathway between self-objectification and body shame, indicating men tended to give importance to competence-based physical attributes rather than superficial ones. Therefore, men’s marginal focus on muscularity, etc. is not a parallel for the overwhelming sexual objectification that women receive in society. Yet it is proposed that some questionnaires be developed in gender-neutral language so that any differences in perspective can be eliminated. One should note that there is no direct pathway between self-objectification or surveillance to disordered eating and depressed mood, rather, they are mediated states.
Overall, since it is clear that our social norms are causing mental and physical issues for both men and women, it is hoped that even if society cannot immediately remedy the constant obsessions and standards of physical attractiveness, there can be some specific remedies introduced to view the body in more holistic terms than superficial ones alone.

The word “Sufism” conjures up a wide range of reactions, depending on your exposure of the subject. To some, it is a respectable, much admired aspiration. For others, it denotes insanity and extremism in religious deviation. I don’t claim to know “the” answer of what it is exactly, but I can share with you some of my experiences in learning about this subject.

In my youth, I was raised in Tablighi Jamaa’aat (Jamaa’aatut Tableegh), which was a way for the masses of Muslims (most notably in the South Asian subcontinent) to learn, practice, and spread Islam. Although we did not practice Sufism, we did hear scant references to “saints” or those who experienced “relgious ecstasy”, etc. and for sure they were a mysterious people who were respected and above us.

After that, as I grew up and started thinking about Islam on my own, it seemed natural to me to read the Quran, ponder its meanings, and worship Allah in whatever way I knew as well as whatever way I felt was proper. So as a youth, I struggled to ponder death, to practice controlling my “nafs” (desire, self), pray with my eyes closed in deep concentration, etc. I would even do things such as fast without speaking because I had read about Zachariyyah and Mariam in the Quran. I had no concept of “innovation”, etc.

When I entered college, I became exposed to the Salafi da’wah, where I learned that innovations in religion were cause for deviation, for losing the original Islam, for following the ways of men over the ways of God. To be fair, I still see the point made here, for no doubt, people should know the roots of what they practice. And even if those who call themselves “Traditionalists” feel this is an erroneous and ill-formed understanding of the religion, no one can doubt that the fault of people who rely only on “transmission” or “following” had led to such a decline that indeed when Salafis would come quoting Quran and Sunnah, one had to bow to the knowledge.

However, if one is to exert themselves a bit, one can see that indeed many of the practices often dismissed as “innovation”, etc. can be seen upheld by many of the greatest scholars in our history - scholars accepted by all. I will not go into detail about this issue (the treatment of “innovation” by various methodologies) as I have discussed it in other places on this blog, but suffice to say there is a lot of confusion on the increasingly polarizing views of the Salafi doctrine (individualist literalism) and those of the Traditionalist doctrine (hierarchical, inherited knowledge). (But I cannot resist adding that the two camps are not exclusive in their treatment of Sufism, for there were Traditionalists who have condemned some aspects while some Literalists allowed things now considered “innovation”, etc.)

So to begin with, you should realize “Sufism” (although often aligned with “Traditionalism”) is simply a separate sphere of study in Islam. Many great scholars of the past were either Sufis themselves, or merely learned from, studied with, or accompanied them. It is the “spiritual path”, to put it simply. A Sufi is one who strives to be near to Allah and is a disciple of spiritual exercises (many scholars have written on this topic, and some even consider “tasawwuf” the only fardh knowledge - in the sense that it is tazkiyyatun nafs, etc.). Yes, it does soften the heart and unlock emotions, and that is why you hear some crazy things from this realm as well.

To clarify, I don’t think you HAVE to be a “Sufi”. In fact, I know of several people who are AMAZING (Allah knows best), people who never joined a tariqah, made bai’ah to a Shaikh, etc. - probably don’t even know what “Sufism” IS, but who try with every fiber of their beings to be close to Allah and are in loving devotion to Him. So what’s the point? The point is that just as much of the knowledge of Islam has been codified and taught, so has some of the spiritual training found within Islam. So for example, if you study “Tajweed”, it is clear you are studying something “new”, not taught by the Prophet sallallaahu ‘alaihi wa sallam. Yet, the science of Tajweed developed over time, as we got further and further away from the natural proficiency that people at the time of the Prophet sallallaahu ‘alaihi wa sallam had. The Sahaabiyaat, radhi’allaahu ‘anhum, were Arabs from that time period, who heard and learnt the recitation of the Quran from the Prophet, etc. Yet, as we moved away from that time period, naturally, we needed more and more knowledge to record exactly how the Quran was originally recited.

Now, you might say, yes, well, that is to recite the Quran in the SAME way (the goal being the same) whereas Sufis do weird things NOT done by the Prophet sallallaahu ‘alaihi wa sallam or only done in a rudimentary form which the Sufis exaggerate in. Yet, you should understand that the GOAL is to come near to the SPIRITUAL state of the most righteous people, and this is done through training passed down by the Prophet sallallaahu ‘alaihi wa sallam, his Companions, radhi’allaahu ‘anhum, and on down through righteous scholars, etc. So just as Tajweed is more complicated, so is all the information and study of how we can get to a spiritual state close to those of our original predecessors (As-Salaf As-Saalih).

Take for example, respect. You might say the Prophet Muhammad sallallaahu ‘alaihi wa sallam sat with his Companions, so close that you could cover all of them with a single sheet. Yet, we know that their level of respect for the Prophet was very high. They would not utter words in his presence, they would hesitate to answer in order to hear his answer first, they would give up all comforts to serve him. Nowadays, we have come so far from the time of the Prophet sallallaahu ‘alaihi wa sallam, that often a Shaikh who is “relaxed” and comfortable with his students, who sits near them and with them, finds that they do not in fact have much respect for him. Instead, they seem him as almost a buddy or pal, someone they can interrupt, disturb, etc.

The “Salafi” in me says that if you have a very high level of respect for your teachers and Shuyookh without the practices of standing, kissing the hand, etc. then all the better - you are there. Yet, many of our youth could use a little training in respect - respect for elders, for teachers, for the knowledgable and authoritative amongst us. Obviously, this should not exceed bounds but one must admit we have come a long way and could use a bit of training.

Thus, Sufism is a study. The Tariqahs trace their chains back to the Prophet sallallaahu ‘alaihi wa sallam (I know that the Shadhili Tariqah, through which Shaikh Nuh trains people, goes through ‘Ali radhi’allaahu ‘anhu). I am thinking of joining this Tariqah, not actually because I think I need it (I do not say this out of arrogance, that I think I’m already great or anything, but meaning in general I don’t believe, just as everyone doesn’t have to study Tajweed, but should know the basics of recitation necessary for daily worship, that anyone HAS to join a Tariqah), but simply because Shaikh Nuh is a 10 minute walk from my house. What a shame it would be to miss learning from such a knowledgeable and devoted (and Allah knows best) scholar. I simply want to learn what I can.
As I mentioned, my knowledge is not great on this topic, but I did feel I wanted to share some of my experiences for the “uninitiated” and maybe inshallah it will bring some insight or benefit, bi ithnillaah.

I am not in the mood to watch films right now. But my husband wanted to do something “fun” with me and so I chose the best I could. (By the way, I annoy my whole family because they say I am very picky about movies and have a very high standard - damn right because I hate wasting my time). Anyway, I was blown away by this movie - it is one of the best I have seen in a long time and I think everyone should see it.

First of all, it’s AMAZINGLY shot - no, no grand, sweeping, romantic scenery, just the unmistakable Texas landscape (man, I have missed it - what’s funny is there was a guy at the theater who was from Amarillo - in Jordan, lol), trailers, and cheap motel rooms. But man, I was in love with the way you could almost hear the buzz of the fluorescents and feel the heat of the landscape. It was the stark details of life that I enjoyed seeing so well captured on film.

Aside from that, it was very well acted - everyone, down the every last extra they had was an authentic character and interesting to watch - that is an amazing feat for a production and I was thoroughly impressed by the acting abilities and direction. The main hero was quite likable, as was Tommy Lee Jones’s wry, wise character. There was truth and wisdom spilling from every word, not to mention subtle bits of humor and humanity. The main “bad” character was thoroughly impressive and powerful - I have not been so frightened of a person in a long time.

The story itself was BRILLIANT, and that’s all I’ll say to you about it if you haven’t seen it.

Read on IF you have already seen it:

First of all, I was on the edge of my seat like the whole time. I must say, it is a gruesome picture and it was very effective. The Coen Brothers have done an amazing job, fulfilling every artist’s dream: to take the particulars of their time and place and relate them to universal themes. At first the “bad guy” was utterly perplexing to me. It made me so uncomfortable seeing someone “get away” with so much. I did see that they made all sorts of allusions to the fact that he was “larger than life” somehow, but near the end when it clicked in my mind that he represented Death, it all made sense - all the allusions, all the hints, the weird hints and implied lines, and I was almost jumping out of my seat with my awe of the film.

Anyway, it’s not only a thoroughly enjoyable movie in its particulars - the psychopathic nature, the chase, etc. - but in its reflection on death - that it strikes at will, and that no one is safe from it. You can’t bargain with it, you can’t escape from it. We all have an appointment in Samarra.

“Every soul must taste death.” - The Quran, Chapter 3

I had a dream about a week ago where a Shaikh made an announcement to the Muslims. He enjoined us all to be “real” Muslims, and instructed us that the duty of every Muslim right now is to:

1. secure your possessions - your laptop, etc.

2. piss off the government

3. get thrown in jail

“You know you’re a real Sufi if you can refuse free food.”

I hate fake people in general, but fake Muslims particularly irk me. First of all, our entire religion is based on truth, so how could a Muslim act like that anyway? Secondly, it’s a bad quality in general since you should strive to be sincere, and this should be true of your dealings with Muslims as well, as all that is a part of Islam. But most of all I guess I get hurt because we’re supposed to be brothers and sisters, so how can some people be so snobby, conniving, and calculated in their dealings with each other?

I have seen some Muslims take help from others and then turn right around and scorn them. I have seen some who will only sit up and say a proper salaam to you if you’re a bigshot or if you know a bigshot. I have seen some who will act one way with you when they are alone and a completely different way in public.

I know I can’t really change this, but as I said, I hate fake people in general, and fake Muslims in particular annoy the hell out of me.

It’s amazing, but it’s been 10 YEARS since I have “sought knowledge”. I never stopped taking the odd class or attending lectures etc. but I mean study systematically as I did when I was about 20 years old. I learned basic Arabic with some grammar as well as tajweed and memorized some of the Quran. It’s funny, but I am now right back at the beginning. My intention in this first phase is to finish memorizing the Quran (seeking ijaazah) and mastery of Arabic.

Now, being in a Muslim country you would think seeking formalized knowledge is easy. Well, yes and no. In some ways it is sad that many scholars do not necessarily sit and train students from the ground up. You might find someone knowledgable but too busy to teach unfortunately, or if they teach then they give a few scant classes. I asked both my Jordanian neighbors and around Kharabsheh (Shaikh Nuh’s camp of students). From the Jordanians what I found was that many of them had no idea there were amazing centers of learning set up right next to them! And from the mostly foreign residents of Kharabsheh they seemed to only know a small circle of options and nothing else.

One sister I spoke to mentioned how sometimes she would hear of a halaqa and ask about it but was told the person was not allowed to tell her! Unfortunately, there are some exclusionary elements in the circles of knowledge. If you don’t know the right people or follow the right lines of thought or have a lot of money, it can be hard to know where to even begin looking to systematically learn (I’m not talking about classes or halaqaat, but actual formalized training). It’s not IMPOSSIBLE, but just a lot harder.

One thing that increasingly gets in the way is “alliance”. The Salafi/Sufi (or Traditional) schism can get annoying having to explain to people that you are fine taking real knowledge from any source. It’s not impossible, again, but is a minor annoyance you will just have to put aside - if you are not like all your classmates or the community you are trying to learn from, just try to face forward and don’t let it stop you from gaining beneficial knowledge.

The other factor is the “secret halaqa” mentality - where knowledge is precious and locked away in a club surrounded by self-righteous bouncers. I know of one brother who knew a Shaikh for about 2 years personally before he sort of hounded him to teach him. Well, what of the rest of us (especially if you’re a girl?). Anyway, Allah makes a way for anyone if they try hard enough and you may end up with something better than you imagined.

The most obvious factor sadly can be simple finances. Right now my husband and I simply don’t have the funds to enroll in JU (Jordan University) or Qasid, which is a school which was started by some of Shaikh Nuh’s students for learning Arabic. The school is excellent, but expensive. I am happy to say the administration was most welcoming and was willing to work something out with us - however, it was not overall an appealing choice since it would involve either working (I have little time with my children, studying, housework, writing, etc.) or being in debt etc. I wanted something that was a better choice for me personally.

Alhamdulillaah, after some searching I have a pretty nice setup. For Quran, there are a series of centers all over Amman (maybe Jordan) called “Jamee’atu ‘alaa Muhaafidhatil Quraanil Kareem” - a very active brother from Houston (the father of one of my students at the Islamic school) when he learned I was going to Jordan gave me the number of the director, but unfortunately I lost it lol. Regardless, what is so great is that these centers are all over - and the “Lajnannisaa`” is soooo close to my house! The cost is an astounding 3 JD’s per month per class. Compared to some of the posts I saw at the zawiya (place of spiritual retreat) where some women charge about 30 per month! Subhanallaah. This particular institution of women has a beautiful name called ‘Ebaadur Rahmaan. I am very happy with my teachers - the one who teaches tajweed is an older woman, with impressive knowledge of all the recitations and perfect tajweed. The one teaching hifdh (I am not very happy with the actual class for hifdh, as it is rather slow and some of the women in the class talk a lot etc.) - but the teacher herself is amazing. She is about my own age, and blind. She doesn’t hold a mushaf of course and how she remembers all the names of all the women in the class I don’t know. Her manners are also very impressive - my first day she came over to me just to give me a hug - and she constantly makes du’aa for everyone and is always smiling. The funny thing is the Director of the school practically apologized for charging anything but said they had to charge a small fee to keep the center going! May Allah reward these amazing people who are making it possible for the average person to go and learn the Quran.

As for Arabic, I found it was much cheaper to get our friend/neighbor (who tutored our children before) to tutor me in Arabic. Alhamdulillaah, he is well educated, has excellent grammar, is religious, and is available! Plus I attend Shaikh ‘Ali Hani’s classes in the zawiya. Those are for free. :) Shaikh ‘Ali is an amazing person, an expert in Arabic grammar. He astounds me subhanallaah. Umm Sahl (Shaikh Nuh’s wife) takes the Balaaghah class and I believe Shaikh Nuh learned from him as well. Inshallah, with this package, I should be able to get somewhere in Arabic bi ithnillaah.

So there you have it - good classes from good people for very little money. All this has prompted me to make a sort of resolution to myself that if I do learn, I will not stop teaching, and for free inshallah.

When I decided to start seriously studying, I walked and walked and walked, sometimes in circles, one day for hours (literally). And alhamdulillaah, Allah provided me with these places all walking distance from my house and for very litte money (I also plan to sit in on the Sufism classes by Shaikh Nuh, just for an introduction - nothing serious yet). There is even a hadith school about 2 minutes from my house! They have a library of ahadith and some manuscripts there and the students memorize Bukhari and Muslim (that may come later inshallah). Our neighbor didn’t even know it was there and it was just if you look from a different angle you can see it right in front of you. The funny thing is, the way to all my classes is uphill and hard going there, but downhill and smooth coming back. But at least it’s a start.